My Journey

I grew up in Baptist churches as a child. My parents were Christians, so I was too. I've never doubted the existence of God. As far back as I can remember I've always accepted it as fact that God sent his only Son to die on the cross for our sins. As far as I can remember, I've always considered myself a Christian but I never really had a relationship with God until recently. A series of events happened in the last year or so that really started to change the way I thought about my faith and about God. A close friend of mine and I grew apart last year because of some things that happened in both of our lives that we didn't necessarily agree with. It was really hard on me in the beginning because we'd become extremely close over the last year. We moved hours away from both of our families to live in Atlanta together. We became each others confidants, each others best friends. The loss of our friendship hit me hard but it didn't break me. Though I shed many tears, I seemed to be comforted throughout the whole thing. I definitely think I've grown as a person as a result of everything that happened. It was then that I really started to realize that God was always with me. How was I able to lose such a close friend, a huge part of my life, yet be okay with it?

The real test came in mid December, a week before Christmas. My family and I would be packing to leave for Arkansas in a couple days to spend Christmas with my mothers parents. I was on my way to work when I got a call from my dad. He told me I needed to go ahead and turn around to come home. My mimi had passed away not an hour earlier. We left in the morning to make the long drive to Bentonville, Arkansas - a couple days early. My mom was quiet most of the way, as were the rest of us. There wasn't much we could say without tearing up again. My mom closed her eyes to take a nap for a while. While driving through Tennessee I looked up at the sky and made a comment to my dad about how beautiful the sunset was. The sky was lit up in all different shades of pink, orange, and light purple. The clouds were unlike any we've ever seen. Before we knew it my mom had woken and and she'd started crying again to herself. We didn't think much of it.. she'd just lost her mother - it was expected. After a few moments she was able to speak.. she told us while we were driving through the mountains, right before she took a nap, she prayed to God asking Him for a sign in the sky to let her know He was with her mother.
That's not a coincidence. That's not luck. That was God.

My mimi specifically requested that when she passed, she wanted her service to be "all about Him." After all, our lives here on earth are meant to be all about Him and that's exactly how she lived. Their pastor preached a message at her memorial service to a packed church. He asked everyone who'd ever been touched by her, or prayed with her personally, to stand. I turned around and completely lost it. Hundreds of people were standing all around the church. The pastor preached a sermon on living a life for God.. 5 people were saved that day.
That's God.

I've often wondered if that day 6 people were saved. I'm no longer a Christian because that's how I was raised. I'm a Christian because I want to live for God. I want to give everything I am to God. I want to live for Him, to worship Him. He is my everything!